Greetings World!
Color me happy and excited. I am down another 4 pounds! Actually, 4.4 if I want to be really accurate. Giving me a total loss of 8.8 pounds since March 13th. I'm very happy about that.
It feels good to be heading into week two with so much positive energy. I'm ready to make another dent in this fat suit this week. I feel like I am in the process of shifting things in my life - moving things around in order to propel myself in the direction that I want to go. It feels very exciting and positive and I am very grateful to be feeling this way!
I don't really have any more to say at the moment, and I have a whole lot of writing to do. But I will check in later when I get the chance. I haven't even figured my food out for the day yet.
Blessings!
Witchymom
Friday, March 21, 2014
Thursday, March 20, 2014
Thursday Check In
Greetings World!
I didn't get the chance to pop in here yesterday to update and I'm sorry about that. I did fine on my eating, even with the spaghetti and garlic bread dinner I made last night. I'm still feeling positive and I'm looking forward to (although I'm not invested in - BIG distinction) getting on the scale tomorrow to see what it has to say.
The only reason I didn't write yesterday was that I had another writing project going on that I needed to pay attention to - for a blog that my husband and I began together a while ago. I actually haven't written a single update for that blog since last June! I was about ready to let the domain name disappear from our control, actually. But then, we took a look at our blog and realized that although we only have eight posts - we have had over 6000 views. Obviously, there is an audience out there that wants to hear what we have to say - so I decided to renew the domain name: ourculinaryadventures.net and keep things going.
If you haven't guessed from the name, it is a cooking and food blog. Our loftier goal is that we want to make every recipe in Gordon Ramsay's Ultimate Cookery Course - but time and money are going to be making that a very slow process. When we started on that blog, my hubby was working outside of the home at a job that paid - well, not great, but an hourly wage nonetheless - and since then, he has been working from home as a freelance writer with me. Our income has gone down a great deal in the process. We always manage to work enough to pay our bills, but that's about it. I will even take a deep breath and admit that, on occasion, we have gone to the food bank. However, we don't get any other kind of assistance and we are paying our own bills from our earnings and for that, I am proud of us.
THAT is the biggest reason the wind was taken out of our sails with our website and now, I'm trying to regroup. So yesterday I spent a considerable period of time writing up a recap for the first episode of Season 12 of Hell's Kitchen. I had no idea how long it took to write a recap for a show like that! ACK! Today, I have to edit it down to a reasonable amount and then get it posted. Then I have my regular writing to do - the stuff that earns me a paycheck every month. I am very behind in that. So yeah, it is going to be a busy day.
A couple of days ago, our housemate used the crockpot to cook up a beautiful corned beef and he made us all sandwiches that night. OMG, delicious! It left behind a crockpot full of this wonderful meat juice, though - basically "corned beef stock" - so yesterday evening I threw in half a bag of 13 bean soup I had and let it cook overnight. This morning, I added the rest of a bag of medium grain brown rice that I had. In a little while, I'm going to chop up at onion and throw it in there, and possibly some zucchini and yellow squash (and anything else that sounds interesting at the time) and that will be our dinner later. I'm all for cooking like this - it's one fantastic way to keep your costs down while serving fresh foods - and with all the veggies and beans, the calorie count should be reasonable, even if I have a big piece of corn bread with it.
Dieting sucks. I just want to cook and live and enjoy my life, doing the things that truly matter to me. I feel more and more ready for new adventures every day!
Blessings!
Witchymom
I didn't get the chance to pop in here yesterday to update and I'm sorry about that. I did fine on my eating, even with the spaghetti and garlic bread dinner I made last night. I'm still feeling positive and I'm looking forward to (although I'm not invested in - BIG distinction) getting on the scale tomorrow to see what it has to say.
The only reason I didn't write yesterday was that I had another writing project going on that I needed to pay attention to - for a blog that my husband and I began together a while ago. I actually haven't written a single update for that blog since last June! I was about ready to let the domain name disappear from our control, actually. But then, we took a look at our blog and realized that although we only have eight posts - we have had over 6000 views. Obviously, there is an audience out there that wants to hear what we have to say - so I decided to renew the domain name: ourculinaryadventures.net and keep things going.
If you haven't guessed from the name, it is a cooking and food blog. Our loftier goal is that we want to make every recipe in Gordon Ramsay's Ultimate Cookery Course - but time and money are going to be making that a very slow process. When we started on that blog, my hubby was working outside of the home at a job that paid - well, not great, but an hourly wage nonetheless - and since then, he has been working from home as a freelance writer with me. Our income has gone down a great deal in the process. We always manage to work enough to pay our bills, but that's about it. I will even take a deep breath and admit that, on occasion, we have gone to the food bank. However, we don't get any other kind of assistance and we are paying our own bills from our earnings and for that, I am proud of us.
THAT is the biggest reason the wind was taken out of our sails with our website and now, I'm trying to regroup. So yesterday I spent a considerable period of time writing up a recap for the first episode of Season 12 of Hell's Kitchen. I had no idea how long it took to write a recap for a show like that! ACK! Today, I have to edit it down to a reasonable amount and then get it posted. Then I have my regular writing to do - the stuff that earns me a paycheck every month. I am very behind in that. So yeah, it is going to be a busy day.
A couple of days ago, our housemate used the crockpot to cook up a beautiful corned beef and he made us all sandwiches that night. OMG, delicious! It left behind a crockpot full of this wonderful meat juice, though - basically "corned beef stock" - so yesterday evening I threw in half a bag of 13 bean soup I had and let it cook overnight. This morning, I added the rest of a bag of medium grain brown rice that I had. In a little while, I'm going to chop up at onion and throw it in there, and possibly some zucchini and yellow squash (and anything else that sounds interesting at the time) and that will be our dinner later. I'm all for cooking like this - it's one fantastic way to keep your costs down while serving fresh foods - and with all the veggies and beans, the calorie count should be reasonable, even if I have a big piece of corn bread with it.
Dieting sucks. I just want to cook and live and enjoy my life, doing the things that truly matter to me. I feel more and more ready for new adventures every day!
Blessings!
Witchymom
Blueberry Coffee Cake
BLUEBERRY COFFEE CAKE
INGREDIENTS
MAIN CAKE
5 Tbsp butter, softened and cut into pieces
3/4 cup Splenda
1 large egg
1/2 tsp. vanilla extract
2 cups flour
2 1/4 tsp. baking powder
1/2 tsp. salt
3/4 cup 1% milk
2 cups fresh blueberries
TOPPING
6 Tbsp butter, softened and cut into pieces
1/2 cup Splenda
1/2 tsp. Cinnamon
1/2 cup flour
1/4 tsp. salt
INSTRUCTIONS
Preheat oven to 350 degrees.
Cream 5 Tbsp butter (cut up) with sugar until blended. Add vanilla and egg and mix until combined.
In separate bowl, whisk together flour, baking powder and salt. Add to butter, sugar, vanilla, and egg mixture, mixing well and scraping bowl. Mixture will be fine crumbles.
Add milk and mix on medium to high speed. Mixture will be thick, like loose bread dough.
Fold in fresh blueberries and then pour into 9 by 13 inch pan and spread out with a baking spatula.
Prepare topping by adding all ingredients for topping into a bowl and mixing with either a pastry cutter or two knives until mixture is crumbly. Pour over the top of the blueberry dough.
Bake for 40 to 45 minutes or until golden brown and sprinkle very lightly with a touch more Splenda. Cut into 12 uniform pieces and serve.
Each piece is approximately 230 calories.
Wednesday, March 19, 2014
A Feeling Inside
Greetings World!
It is a very small thing at this point, but I'm feeling a change. Women who have been pregnant know the feeling of that moment when you first really become aware of your baby inside - that first flutter of movement and feeling that, yes, something is happening here. Way before anyone else can see it or know it - you feel it and know it and despite the fact that it is a teeny tiny thing - you know that in time, it will blossom forth in a huge way.
What I'm feeling - it's kinda like that.
This morning while laying in bed, I felt that my belly is smaller. It's gotten so bloated up lately with this friggin' weight gain...but today, it was smaller as I lay on my back and smoothed my hands over it. When I got up, I felt less "stuff" there when I bent and moved. This small part of me feels different - feels lighter - and there is an awakening sense of excitement inside of me over it.
I like this feeling. It's a little uncomfortable to me to talk about it, though. After all, I've had this feeling many times before. And many times before, I have ridden this feeling for a little while and then, at some point, crashed and burned - and stayed fat. I have failed at this journey time and time and time again.
But I've also done well enough at it at times that I KNOW it is do-able. I know how to make this happen. I just have to be ready to let it.
I am going to be 50 next month. I really am ready for my real life to begin, as the song says. I have things I want to do and places I want to go and I can't do those things while trapped under all this weight and weakness. So, I'm going to happily and graciously accept the blessing of this tiny little bit of excitement - trusting that if I nurture it and give energy to it - it will bloom!
Blessings!
Witchymom
It is a very small thing at this point, but I'm feeling a change. Women who have been pregnant know the feeling of that moment when you first really become aware of your baby inside - that first flutter of movement and feeling that, yes, something is happening here. Way before anyone else can see it or know it - you feel it and know it and despite the fact that it is a teeny tiny thing - you know that in time, it will blossom forth in a huge way.
What I'm feeling - it's kinda like that.
This morning while laying in bed, I felt that my belly is smaller. It's gotten so bloated up lately with this friggin' weight gain...but today, it was smaller as I lay on my back and smoothed my hands over it. When I got up, I felt less "stuff" there when I bent and moved. This small part of me feels different - feels lighter - and there is an awakening sense of excitement inside of me over it.
I like this feeling. It's a little uncomfortable to me to talk about it, though. After all, I've had this feeling many times before. And many times before, I have ridden this feeling for a little while and then, at some point, crashed and burned - and stayed fat. I have failed at this journey time and time and time again.
But I've also done well enough at it at times that I KNOW it is do-able. I know how to make this happen. I just have to be ready to let it.
I am going to be 50 next month. I really am ready for my real life to begin, as the song says. I have things I want to do and places I want to go and I can't do those things while trapped under all this weight and weakness. So, I'm going to happily and graciously accept the blessing of this tiny little bit of excitement - trusting that if I nurture it and give energy to it - it will bloom!
Blessings!
Witchymom
Tuesday, March 18, 2014
Excess Weight - What Makes People Put on a "Fat Suit?" (Part One)
Greetings World!
I have been overweight most of my life and I honestly don't remember a time when I didn't feel fat, clumsy, and ungainly. I look back into my farthest memories and an overwhelming majority of them can be separated into five piles:
I have been overweight most of my life and I honestly don't remember a time when I didn't feel fat, clumsy, and ungainly. I look back into my farthest memories and an overwhelming majority of them can be separated into five piles:
- Food
- Something I was incapable of doing right
- Some person who was picking on me for my weight or clumsiness
- Some friend who mostly liked me but who also looked down on me about something
- Fear
Today, I want to talk about Food.
It was a few years back when I came to realize that I seem to have an inordinate amount of memories revolving around food. I remember my grandma's wonderful cooking and how she would always make me my own baby pancakes or baby pies whenever she made the regular-sized version, which was often. She loved to bake and cook and there were always amazing smells at grandma's house. She made black raspberry jam from the black raspberry patch she'd cultivated herself on her farm and it was the most heavenly smell in the world when she was cooking fruit and letting it drain from cheesecloth. It was very magical to me.
There was the food I ate at school. So many people talk with disdain about bad school lunches, but for me, they were wonderful. It was a chance to drown my sorrows over being one of the most picked on kids in elementary school. (There were two of us - me and a guy named Ronnie - and it was the "thing" to pick on us. Publicly being nice to either of us could earn a person public ridicule in the extreme. Even kids younger than me would call me names as evidence to their friends as to how tough they were for picking on one of the older kids.
When I was in 6th grade, I signed up to work in the cafeteria. They were always looking for kids to work because most kids considered it so UNCOOL to work in there that it was sure to get you picked on. But hell, I dealt with that all the time so it wasn't going to make it worse. It just meant that I could make friends with the cafeteria workers, I could get out of class (and away from the jerks) for a little while every day, I could be friendly with the few kids brave enough to work in there with me, and - the best part of all - I could eat all I wanted. We cafeteria kids got extras of any leftovers after everyone else was served. We'd sit around the table in back and feast. Sometimes, there at that little table, I was actually ADMIRED for being able to eat so much.
Then there was my mom. My relationship with her was always difficult, mostly because I was scared to death of her. She was angry and mean and seemed to resent being a mom.
(She and I are good friends now and I love her very much. It's important to me to make sure you hear that (and you'll hear it more than once) when I talk about this stuff because back then - she did a LOT of damage to me and I will be talking about that. We both worked very hard to reach the place we have and our relationship is proof that it can be done - but you have to really want it.)
In any case, my childhood always felt a bit like I was walking in a field full of landmines, trying to walk carefully and consciously so that I wouldn't invariably trigger an attack/explosion. And with my mom, one of the best ways I found to feel safe with her was when we were eating together. (That, and laughing - I firmly believe I developed my sense of humor partly because it made me safer when I made my mom laugh.) There are countless memories of us finding some food to eat together that we "probably shouldn't be eating but it tastes so good" and the role I took on as her "partner in crime" at those moments earned me not only safety, but actual closeness and camaraderie with her - at least for the amount of time it took to eat the pizza or pie or whatever we were stuffing our faces with at the moment.
I remember coming home after particularly difficult days at school and, if the house was empty, just binge eating on something. Sometimes it was ketchup sandwiches on white bread. Sometimes it was milk and cookies. Sometimes ice cream. Whatever it was, the real key was that I had to only eat a certain amount, so I wouldn't get busted. So I learned to eat a little of this and a little of that. When I got my allowance, I often bought my own cheap treats so I could pig out without anyone being the wiser. Looking back on it now, I can't help but shake my head a bit at how unhealthy my behavior was - and how sad. I was such a sad and broken kid, really.
Why did I eat like that?
I think that mostly, food was my friend and my comfort. It made me happy and gave me pleasure. It tied me to my grandma - the most beloved person in the world. When I was seven, my mom moved me far away from her farm in Indiana to Gallup, NM, and OH I HATED IT THERE. But when I ate certain foods, I could close my eyes and be back in Indiana and feel better for a little while.
In some ways, I'm thankful that I had food to help me get through the hell that was my childhood (which continued on in my young adult years.) Without food, I might have been more vulnerable to turning to alcohol or drugs for my "fix". It's hard to say really. All I know is that my food obsessions go way back and I have barely scratched the surface here.
I'd love to hear from others on this topic. Do you have food obsessions or do you remember having them in the past? What reasons (besides hunger) do you eat?
Blessings!
Witchymom
Monday, March 17, 2014
Happy St. Paddy's Day!
Greetings World!
Sorry I didn't update last night. The night just got away from me.
I made a fabulous dinner last night. I cooked some big, meaty chicken breasts up in a pan, with just a little olive oil, garlic, salt and pepper. While they cooked, I cooked up some sliced onions, bell peppers, and mushrooms in another skillet with just a bit of garlic butter. While they cooked, I also boiled up a mess of brussel sprouts. Along with all that, we had baked potatoes and some fresh honey wheat bread from the bakery - yum!
For those of you to hate brussel sprouts, but are curious and open minded enough to give them another try - I really recommend that you do. It helps if you have someone in your life that loves them - so you have someone to give them to if these are a fail, too. But depending on what you don't like about brussel sprouts, they really can be worth a second look.
I speak from experience. I hated those things my whole life, with a hatred that can not be accurately expressed. They were the bane of my existence in childhood and I have systematically avoided them since then, except for a very few occasions when some brussel sprout lover in my life INSISTED, "oh...you just haven't had them cooked right. You'll love mine!", to which I would sigh and agree to take one bite and invariably assure them that nope - my hatred for brussel sprouts was still firmly intact, thank you very much.
Then I went and married me a brussel sprouts lover. And while he never made much comment about it, after a year or so I started to feel really bad that because I hated them, he never got any of them with his dinner. So, I set out to look online for cooking instructions, bought a bag of fresh brussel sprouts, and did exactly as instructed.
They actually looked good to me - fresh and deep green and better than I'd ever seen them look. Could there be that much difference between the fresh ones and the frozen ones I'd always seen other people making?
Yes. Yes there could.
I decided to try one and OMG - that was the moment that I became a lover of brussel sprouts. Everything shifted with that one little bite.
So...here's what you do if you want to try them again:
Buy fresh brussel sprouts. Like, seriously...don't even bother with those frozen things. YUCK.
Fill a pan with water (figuring out approximately how much water and what sized pan is up to you - you want the water to NOT overflow after you dump your brussel sprouts into it. You want the water covering them (although they float) and not running over the sides.)
Heat that water on the stove and while it heats to boiling, attend to your brussel sprouts.
Take your fresh brussel sprouts and cut off the little brown stem at the bottom and then clean off any loose leaves left behind. Smell one and take note how fresh and green and wonderful it smells. Put it in a bowl. I like to use a bowl that approximates my pan size, just to keep myself from going overboard with the brussel sprouts.
Repeat until you have cut and cleaned up all the brussel sprouts you want to cook and then take them over to the sink to give them a good rinsing (always a good practice).
Once your water is boiling (or close to it - and it should be by now) you can put your brussel sprouts in it. I like to use a slotted spoon to gently lower them in. I HATE when hot water splashes on me.
Let them cook at that sort of slow boiling state for a while. 20 to 30 minutes is good. They will become more vibrantly green and pretty and they will be tender, but not mushy, when they are properly cooked.
Feast. I like to sprinkle Butter Buds on mine but really - whatever works for you.
Not much else to say for now - sorry about that. I did stay within my calories yesterday and so far today, too. I'm enjoying the hell out of eating better and cooking more and will share more recipes soon. Right now, I'm mostly focused on getting into the practice of writing in here every day, but I have thoughts and plans for this place and will add more as I can.
I'm sure you'll hear from me later today. For now...
Blessings!
Witchymom
Sorry I didn't update last night. The night just got away from me.
I made a fabulous dinner last night. I cooked some big, meaty chicken breasts up in a pan, with just a little olive oil, garlic, salt and pepper. While they cooked, I cooked up some sliced onions, bell peppers, and mushrooms in another skillet with just a bit of garlic butter. While they cooked, I also boiled up a mess of brussel sprouts. Along with all that, we had baked potatoes and some fresh honey wheat bread from the bakery - yum!
For those of you to hate brussel sprouts, but are curious and open minded enough to give them another try - I really recommend that you do. It helps if you have someone in your life that loves them - so you have someone to give them to if these are a fail, too. But depending on what you don't like about brussel sprouts, they really can be worth a second look.
I speak from experience. I hated those things my whole life, with a hatred that can not be accurately expressed. They were the bane of my existence in childhood and I have systematically avoided them since then, except for a very few occasions when some brussel sprout lover in my life INSISTED, "oh...you just haven't had them cooked right. You'll love mine!", to which I would sigh and agree to take one bite and invariably assure them that nope - my hatred for brussel sprouts was still firmly intact, thank you very much.
Then I went and married me a brussel sprouts lover. And while he never made much comment about it, after a year or so I started to feel really bad that because I hated them, he never got any of them with his dinner. So, I set out to look online for cooking instructions, bought a bag of fresh brussel sprouts, and did exactly as instructed.
They actually looked good to me - fresh and deep green and better than I'd ever seen them look. Could there be that much difference between the fresh ones and the frozen ones I'd always seen other people making?
Yes. Yes there could.
I decided to try one and OMG - that was the moment that I became a lover of brussel sprouts. Everything shifted with that one little bite.
So...here's what you do if you want to try them again:
Buy fresh brussel sprouts. Like, seriously...don't even bother with those frozen things. YUCK.
Fill a pan with water (figuring out approximately how much water and what sized pan is up to you - you want the water to NOT overflow after you dump your brussel sprouts into it. You want the water covering them (although they float) and not running over the sides.)
Heat that water on the stove and while it heats to boiling, attend to your brussel sprouts.
Take your fresh brussel sprouts and cut off the little brown stem at the bottom and then clean off any loose leaves left behind. Smell one and take note how fresh and green and wonderful it smells. Put it in a bowl. I like to use a bowl that approximates my pan size, just to keep myself from going overboard with the brussel sprouts.
Repeat until you have cut and cleaned up all the brussel sprouts you want to cook and then take them over to the sink to give them a good rinsing (always a good practice).
Once your water is boiling (or close to it - and it should be by now) you can put your brussel sprouts in it. I like to use a slotted spoon to gently lower them in. I HATE when hot water splashes on me.
Let them cook at that sort of slow boiling state for a while. 20 to 30 minutes is good. They will become more vibrantly green and pretty and they will be tender, but not mushy, when they are properly cooked.
Feast. I like to sprinkle Butter Buds on mine but really - whatever works for you.
Not much else to say for now - sorry about that. I did stay within my calories yesterday and so far today, too. I'm enjoying the hell out of eating better and cooking more and will share more recipes soon. Right now, I'm mostly focused on getting into the practice of writing in here every day, but I have thoughts and plans for this place and will add more as I can.
I'm sure you'll hear from me later today. For now...
Blessings!
Witchymom
Sunday, March 16, 2014
My Weight Loss is Happening!
Greetings World!
Yes, I've been down this road before - and lost 60 pounds at one time - but it's been a while. But I am very happy to state that after three days of strictly staying within my calorie range according to "Lose It" - I am down 4.4 POUNDS!
I realize, as always, that some of this is probably the loss of water weight and that's just fine. It feels better, regardless. I have less swelling and pain in my foot, making it easier to move around and do the things I want and need to do. So I am thrilled!
I really don't plan to weigh more than once a week normally - every Friday, maybe. But I was noticing a difference in my foot and my belly last night, so I had to satisfy my curiosity. One thing you might as well know right now - I'm not much of a rule follower. So while I will strive for once a week weigh ins, I also know that I'll hop on the scale any time I feel a reason to do so. I just don't do it every day, for certain - that's the kiss of death, I think. I hate being ruled by the scale.
Anyway...just wanted to share this little bit of good news this morning. I'll update again later when I've made it through the day!
Blessings,
Witchymom
Yes, I've been down this road before - and lost 60 pounds at one time - but it's been a while. But I am very happy to state that after three days of strictly staying within my calorie range according to "Lose It" - I am down 4.4 POUNDS!
I realize, as always, that some of this is probably the loss of water weight and that's just fine. It feels better, regardless. I have less swelling and pain in my foot, making it easier to move around and do the things I want and need to do. So I am thrilled!
I really don't plan to weigh more than once a week normally - every Friday, maybe. But I was noticing a difference in my foot and my belly last night, so I had to satisfy my curiosity. One thing you might as well know right now - I'm not much of a rule follower. So while I will strive for once a week weigh ins, I also know that I'll hop on the scale any time I feel a reason to do so. I just don't do it every day, for certain - that's the kiss of death, I think. I hate being ruled by the scale.
Anyway...just wanted to share this little bit of good news this morning. I'll update again later when I've made it through the day!
Blessings,
Witchymom
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